I chose this life

Two years ago, I had a dream that felt more like a memory.

I was a celestial being, hovering above the planets, deciding where to go in my next incarnation. I zoomed in on Earth, then closer, until I saw my husband and my son.

They didn’t exist yet, but I could see their future.

They were expecting me, even though they didn’t know it.

That’s where I need to go, I told myself. They're waiting for me.

I loved them before I knew them. I claimed them before any of us were born.

I want to stay with them as long as I can, I told my celestial friend.

Stay as long as you need, he said.

And so I swooped down to Earth and spent the next 38 years learning life's hard lessons.

I made mistakes to learn forgiveness.

I faced failure to learn perseverance.

I survived betrayal to learn loyalty.

I endured shame to learn compassion.

I let go to learn acceptance.

I started over to learn hope.

I knew loneliness to learn empathy.

I faced uncertainty to learn courage.

I asked for help to learn humility.

I chased approval to learn self-worth.

And after all those years as a student in the school of life, I found them.

I didn't choose this life because it was easy. I chose it because there was something worth becoming human for.